I formally started homeschooling my son, about 15 days ago, at the end of the Dushera Holidays. The first 3 days were completely chaotic trying to find a rhythm and pattern. By the end of each day, my son and I were both pulling our hair apart. I was obviously wondering if this is the right way to go for both of us. They say perseverance pays and it did, in our case too. Soon we took off the ground and started flying smoothly. Since then, each day that goes by in the Homeschooling routine, I feel more relaxed and confident that homeschooling is the way to go for my 5 year old son.
All though, I had informed the school about my decision to homeschool my child, I was yet to complete the formalities of getting the School Leaving Certificate and TC. Something in me was hesitant in taking this final step, because once done, there was no going back. The last few days of homeschooling have been so good that I felt confident about going this last mile. Today, I informed the school I would be coming to sign the final paper work. I went in and signed on the dotted line to formally take complete ownership of my son. Honestly, even though I am 200% confident that homeschooling is the way to go for my son, signing the papers today was a very emotional moment. I don’t know why but I felt like crying. I am not sure if the emotion stemmed from joy or sorrow. I had finally done it, stopped something that I was sure was not right and started something that was already showing results. But yet, the lingering doubt, the fear doesn’t let go of it’s grip so easily. After all, generations of conditioning cannot be eradicated in just a few months. As I drove my car out of the big gray school gates, I questioned myself once again, “Am I sure, I can do this? I have never done this before. I have never received training on this before. I don’t even know what all he will need to learn over the next 10 years. Will he be able to go to college? Will he ever fit in with the rest of the world? What if I go wrong? What if I am not as good as the school? What if I mess up my child’s life?”
Honestly, it’s been a tough day but I am happy that it is over. We are officially homeschoolers now and we have nothing to look back upon. From today, my son is 100% my responsibility. If we go wrong somewhere, I have no school, no nanny, no teacher to blame. I have no system to curse. I have no one but myself to correct to ensure that my child gets the best learning that he deserves.
Since I announced the decision of Homeschooling to family and friends, I have received a lot of negative comments. But somehow in this case, I just know that I am doing the right thing. I have never felt so sure about anything before. I am aware that by pulling him out of school, I am making sure that my child will always feel different from his peers. He will never totally fit in with all his school going friends. But then, why are we always so scared of being different? Why do we all have to fit in the same bucket, knowing very well that each one of us are unique, even knowing that the bucket is wrong for us? Why do we have to worry if someone points a finger to say that we are different? Of course, we are different! I am extremely proud that we have been able to take a stand to celebrate our differences and choose not to fit in with 99% of the crowd.
This has been perhaps the most difficult decision of my life, because I know I am dealing with my child’s future. But watching him go down a path which was not right, was even harder to live with every day. Starting today, I am fully responsible and accountable for the education of my child. The buck finally stops here.
If you would like to know the reasons why I chose to homeschool, read here – https://www.momspresso.com/parenting/inspired-from-child-life/article/why-we-choose-to-homeschool-our-children
This article was first published on Momspresso because I want to reach out to as many parents as possible to help them understand the journey of a Homeschooling parent.