Did you know – those born with special needs, are at the same time also born with special skills, which most of us “normal” beings don’t possess. Like we consider them needy, I am sure they consider us more so.
Sometimes the Love that you have nurtured and held dear for a long time, has the capability to strangle you completely, till you are gasping for breath. Going through that phase with Yog. His attention for me, and demands of attention from me, are leaving me completely perplexed. When I am at home, the only way to get two minutes to talk, eat or even pee seems like a luxury, a gift granted from God itself. On one hand, I love the fact that he adores me so much. On the other, I wish there was a better form of adulation he could figure out.
Sense of Purpose
The smallest ant, the mightiest mountain, the farthest planet and even the darkest hole in the milky way is all there for a purpose. Yet, most human beings, considered the most intelligent specie ever, live our lives on a daily basis without the sense of a positive purpose. If that is what intelligence means, my request to God – I would like to go back to being an Ape.
Time to Focus
Just like we cannot replace 1 hour of daily exercise for 10 days, with 10 hours of continuous exercise in 1 day; we cannot replace quality time spent with relationships on a daily basis, with years of continuous time together. Some things flourish with just a little focus every day. If we don’t give that now, we can never hope to compensate for it later in life.
Lesson on Change Management from Yog
I seem to be re-learning all Project Management lessons from my children. After a session on perception management from Toyna, Yog taught me a very useful lesson on Change Management. As Yog turned one year old, the pressure on me to give up infant practices and transition him into toddler ways started to build up. After his first birthday we took a small vacation and I made up my mind to start working with him on the transition, soon after we return. This meant weaning him from breast milk and formula to cows milk, stopping his bottle feeding and feeding in the middle of nights, not grinding his food and not having him watch TV…
Lesson on Perception Management
Lesson on Perception Management from Toyna:Yesterday evening, I was trying to win a debate on food choices for Toyna. In order to make her feel she was in control of her choices, I said, “I even ask you each day what you want for your school tiffin. And I give you just that, then how can you say I don’t let you decide what you want to eat.”Her prompt answer, “You ask me what I want for tiffin, because you can’t think what to make for me!!”I literally had my mouth open for a few seconds as I soaked in her perspective to all my hard work.
Learning about the World
Morning walks with Yog have now transformed from “Learning to Walk” exercise, to “Learning about his World” exercise. We walk less, but stoop more to pick up things from the road. He feels almost every fallen item on the road to explore its colour and texture. If there is something very interesting (usually a stone or a shiny wrapper), he decides to sit down on the road or on the mud alongside the road to give the item its full attention. In the initial days, I used to worry about hygiene and infections, but I figured the amount of learning involved for him in this whole exercise is much more than…
Walking and Falling
After a month of holding hands with Yog and religiously walking around, Yog finally started walking on his own. Watching him grow towards taking his first few steps on his own has been a significant journey for all of us. In the early days of trying to walk, he lost his balance once and fell hard. Ever since that day, he became skeptical of walking. Somewhere in his mind, he associated walking with falling and getting hurt. In the last month, we all knew he was capable of walking on his own, but he wouldn’t let go of our hand. For him, the fear of falling was way stronger than…
99% of us out here are extremely capable of surviving on our own. Yet, 99% out of this 99% choose to find that one person in life who makes the feeling of dependence irresistible.
I think I can make a generic comment on behalf of working mothers: While others look forward to going back home, after a long day at work, we look forward to going to work after a long winding morning to catch up on our peace of mind. No matter how crazy work is, it will always be more relaxing than the chaos at home.