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What would you do without trust?

August 6, 2012 /
What would you do –
  • If you realized your child was lying to you
  • If your team was hiding critical facts
  • If your partner in love was willfully misleading you
  • Would punishing the child, stop them from lying?
  • Would reprimanding the team, stop them from hiding?
  • Would blaming and fighting with the partner, stop them from misleading?

All three may seem like very different situations but perhaps stem from the same root cause – Lack of trust.

  • The child doesn’t trust that you will understand, therefore they lie.
  • The team doesn’t trust that you will support,  therefore they hide.
  • And the partner doesn’t trust that you will care, understand and support, and therefore they mislead.

If one was to solve these three problems the answer then would be very simple – Build the trust! As soon as we think of this answer, many of us will instantly think – But I have done everything already. If they still don’t trust me, then it is not my problem. Well, unless we consciously want an unruly kid, an under productive and demotivated team, and an unhappy relationship; it is definitely our problem to solve.

If we agree that we need to build trust, we then will ask how does one build trust? 

  • By repeating 100 times a day – I trust you, or
  • By taking them on exotic vacations, or
  • By buying expensive gifts for them
Funny as they might sound, we actually do all of the above to show someone how much we love and trust them. In my opinion, all of these work as a quick fix temporary solutions. However, the only way of building sustainable trust is to step in the shoes of the other; understand and appreciate their perspective. Once they see acceptance of their perspective, they will open up and start to trust you. 
If you don’t trust me on this one, try it out and tell me how it worked out for you. 

I am an ex-Management Consultant and a successful entrepreneur having close to twenty years of corporate experience. I am currently focusing full time on being a homeschooling parent while researching on the future of education and alternate methods of education. I am also a Vedic Math Trainer, an Operations Manager at a business run by her children and a philanthropist working with tens of other under privileged children. I bring all my past and current experiences together in the form of writing blogs. Using these blogs I wish to create awareness in parents, caregivers and educators about parenting, education and holistic living.