I might be the biological mother for Yog, but honestly, better than me, he has two more mothers in our house. One, without doubt, is his grandmother whom he spends a lot of his waking time with. The other, quite unexpectedly is 9 year old Toyna. When Yog was born, I hadn’t expected Toyna to be able to connect much. After all, there is a significant age gap between the two. On top of that, she hardly has any time after her school, homework and friends to spare with Yog. But as the two are growing, the connection is so deep, it seems it has always been there.
When Pavan is travelling, Toyna chooses to sleep with me in our room. I am in the middle, with Yog in his crib on one side and Toyna on my bed on my other side. I thought it would be a nice cozy feeling to have my angels with me, in the night, but I wasn’t prepared for one thing – Toynas motherly instincts for Yog. Yog moves around in his crib the whole night, wakes up once in a while, and cries out for attention some times. I usually give him 30 seconds to go back to sleep, on his own, before I intervene. This works in 90% cases and he usually goes back to his slumber unassisted. However, with Toyna in our room, it is a different story. The minute Yog makes the tiniest of sounds, Toyna, who otherwise is a deep sleeper, is up. I can hear Yog too, but I am prepared to wait it out. Seeing that I am not reacting, Toyna gets worried. She will immediately poke me and say in a concerned voice, “Mama, Yog woke up!”. Hearing someone speak, is a sign for Yog that someone else is awake too. This means that he can sit up in bed and demand his share of proper attention. I literally groan in my sleep, as I have to get out of bed to take care of Yog. As I put him back to sleep, I have to assure a concerned Toyna that I am awake now and will take care of Yog.
The concern that Toyna carries for Yog, brings out some much maturity in her. As the only child for so many years, she was quite content in her own fairy world. I could never have imagined, she being capable of such maturity and sensibility for another human being, and that too someone who cannot express himself at all. I am pretty sure Yog will reciprocate this connection, as he grows bigger. As Yog enters adolescence, Toyna will be the role model for him. I feel pity for any future girlfriends of Yog. They will have to catch up in one way or another with Toynas role model image in Yogs mind. This means that they will have to notoriously adventurous, outgoing, temperamental, bear expensive tastes, and above all adore him for everything.
In a mothers mind, it so much fun to visualize those days. I can imagine, Toyna and Yog huddled together behind closed doors; Toyna giving advice to Yog on his relationships. Yog is definitely in very good hands. I just wish, I can provide the same comradeship to Toyna as she is growing up.